A Complete Explanation Of Everything

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Another shark in the tank...

I see RTE, our esteemed national broadcaster are trying to go head to head with me by airing some trite piece of muck under the misbegotten title: "The Ultimate Guide to Everything".

Well, Sirs! I tell you it is not that easy! Over the past 2 years, aceofeverything has tried it's darn level assed best to deliver some pearls and nuggets of insight and shit. And it's not an easy course to steer, considering I'm trying to stay incognito in a work sense and can't talk about that and I've left active politics on a daily basis and have consequently less to rant about other than in the most esoteric sense. Which happily, is the way I do it best.

There's plenty I could talk about but pitching into the ethereal void of the interwebs, I'm more inclined to toss ironic matches into the dark than try and bring any real clarity to any issue. Hence the title of this blog, a shot in the dark, a stab in the arm of irony, just to get the pulse flowing...

So, if you have any burning issues which you wish me to illuminate, let me know, I'm better challenged than picking topics off at random.

I promised you a piece on Bertie which will come, there will be some music stuff shortly (finally, I promise), perhaps a piece on violence and some more frontline reports on the property market. Also, the aceofeverything set piece which concerns sexy female bassplayers.

Aside from that, I'm open to suggestion.
posted by Christophe at 22.4.08 3 comments

Sunday, April 20, 2008

I could use a pint after that...



I have a poor sense of balance at the best of times, not for the fainthearted that one!!! Fair play to whoever managed to film and walk this!!!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caminito_del_Rey
posted by Christophe at 20.4.08 0 comments

Friday, April 11, 2008

Tegan & Sara - You wouldn't like me

posted by Christophe at 11.4.08 0 comments

Thursday, April 10, 2008

This could mean promotion, or death...

So apparently officially unofficially I've been promoted and made manager before 30, which is pretty good going. I'm not officially unofficially even allowed to mention what part of the organisation I'm moving to but what can you do.

It will all come out in the wash, I suppose, I know and I've made the proverbial deal with the devil. This should mean all sorts of good complimentary things, if not a whole heap more cash but it adds rungs to the ladder and I was perilously close to getting to the top of that ladder.

Time for a change though, I've spent six years in my current position, though promoted twice within it, did an M.A. in International Relations part-time and took a 4 month sabbatical to travel the planet. I'd say, that's pretty much all you can do before you have to head for pastures new.

The drama is playing out nicely though, my big boss is retiring come the Autumn, the department is kinda being liquidated in a vast political power grab but that's the way of things and there ain't no point being sentimental about it. I'll miss working with the kids but things can't stay the same forever.

I'll keep you posted in terms of when I move, apparently June is my due date but I'm used to the timetable slipping in that place.

Now, if only the housing market would stabilise somewhat, I could get working on having my own lovely pile of bricks and driving nails in the wall. Once I get my white picket fence, I could start searching for that 21 year old, with long black hair, stellar taste in music and whatever it is that is supposed to complete me.

Hey, someone stole her from me when I was 21, it's time to pay back a favour...

Or at least in 10 months time...
posted by Christophe at 10.4.08 2 comments

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Erin Winters - MIA...









... that said, almost every day, someone will write a question about Erin Winters. Here's an exclusive for blog readers: that is a character who is never, ever, coming back. I have written why at length in Scary Go Round book 6 (in which she features prominently) so I guess you'll have to read it to discover my tedious thoughts on the matter.

Christophe said...

I'd bet anything she comes back now...


John A said...

I'll take that bet. The odds are 100/1 so just Paypal as much money to me as you want to wager and I'll pay out when she next appears in the comic.


Christophe said...

This could work. If I can find another bookie to hedge this off to, I'll come back to you...

I think this is how sub-prime in the states got started...

SGR
posted by Christophe at 9.4.08 0 comments

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

The World Assembly...

Hey look, a game I used to waste far too much time on has gotten into some tepid water...

The United Nations vs Me

The other day I was digging through my Junk folder when I found an e-mail from the United Nations. I know what you’re thinking: “Wow! That is one politically astute mail filter.” But pretty much all email to my public address without the word “duck” in the subject, as per my contact page, gets flagged as spam, and the UN chose not to do that. Apparently arbitrary yet effective protocols for ensuring open communication aren’t something the UN wants anything to do with. Or maybe they have something against ducks. I don’t know. Whatever the reason, they went with the subject, “Notice of cease and desist.”

Naturally, it was about NationStates. It’s always about NationStates. I have Nike shooting teenagers and Coke marketing Fukk, that’s no problem. But one player says something mean to another in my web game and they’re going to sue me into oblivion. Anyway, what upset the United Nations was that I put them into NationStates. It’s the place where players come together to debate and pass international law; in the five years the game has been running, they’ve implemented privacy safeguards, promoted religious tolerance, passed a universal bill of rights, and outlawed child labor, amongst 240 other resolutions.

Clearly this wasn’t anything the real UN wanted to be associated with:

Dear Mr. Barry,

It has come to our attention that you are operating an online game called “NationStates”, www.nationstates.net, and that this game uses the UN name and emblem, without authorization…

We therefore demand that you immediately cease and desist from using the United Nations name and emblem in the above-referenced online game, and that in the future you refrain from using or making any reference to them in connection with your activities.


My first reaction was pride. Receiving a threatening letter from the United Nations; I finally felt like I’d done something with my life. Also, there is something inherently amusing about UN threats. I mean, I think the UN does a lot of great work, but let’s face it, they tend to specialize in demands backed by the threat of further, even more stridently voiced demands. Frankly, “You are hereby ordered to cease and desist” was a lot scarier before I got to “says the UN.”

But they did have a point. In 2002, I whacked the United Nations into my game, complete with copyrighted emblem, not so much in parody as to say, “Hey, look, this is just like the real UN.” I can’t remember ever thinking about the legal consequences; I probably assumed that even if the UN noticed, they’d have plenty of blood-thirsty dictators and international war crimes to prosecute before me. But what with Saddam behind bars and all that world peace you’ve been hearing so much about, I guess they worked their way down to me.

I wondered whether it was worth fighting. It would probably be eight years before they got inspections organized, and by then I could keep moving my UN references around where they wouldn’t find them. And it could be great fun. I could represent myself and wear cheap suits and tell the court that it was on trial. But for that to work, I would need an opponent who might actually be embarrassed by the expense and public profile involved in a petty IP lawsuit, and I just wasn’t confident the UN falls into that category. That the single biggest label on the front page of the UN web site is “Copyright, United Nations, 2008” struck me as an ill omen. Also, I do support the UN. I mean, sure, it’s about as functional as a cat with 192 heads, and a lot of those heads are corrupt. But at least they’re trying. At least the heads have to look at each other. I feel like if I’m going into legal battle with somebody, it probably shouldn’t be an organization whose foremost goal is world peace.

Plus I got a lawyer’s opinion, and he said I was blatantly in the wrong. So I decided to cave.

So now I have to rename my UN. I was tempted to go with something a little insulting, like “Discordant Nations,” or “Ridiculously Petty Bureaucracy of Nations Who Should Have Better Things To Do.” But no, that would be sinking to their level. NationStates now has a “World Assembly.”

I suppose this explains why it takes the UN so long to get round to things like a million people dying in Rwanda and shit...
posted by Christophe at 8.4.08 0 comments

"Up the gut"

Cute YHT guest strip at Dandy & Company today, you'd need to understand a little bit about American football but when it comes to sports I could watch two flies going up a wall these days...

posted by Christophe at 8.4.08 0 comments

Friday, April 4, 2008

Desperate Dan, the odd man out...

Ok, skimming through the doom and gloom merchants chief website, RTE.ie, I came across the following gem from our good friends at Bank of Ireland and Desperate Dan McLaughlin...

"BoI's Job Outlook is Brighter"

O'course, that was a week ago before we got the news today that we had the biggest increase on the live register ever, or since 1968, depending on who you believe and Desperate probably has a new forecast... But he'd better underpin it with something more realistic than:

"Bank of Ireland's chief economist Dan McLaughlin insisted today that strong employment growth in the services sector would more than compensate for job losses in the construction sector."

Insist away Dan but for people to work in the Services industry you need people to have actual money to fucking spend!!! And that would entail real jobs elsewhere and not in the Services industry!!!

Anyway my original point, was the sunny beam of positive optimism that Desperate Dan's rubbish represented in the midst of these headlines immediately adjacent:

Related Stories

"Central Bank lowers growth forecasts"

"Ahern gives lower growth forecast"

"Report sees pick-up after slower 2008"

"Solid 2007 growth, but late slowdown"


Top Headlines

"Shocking' March Live Register rise"

"Central Bank lowers forecasts again"

"March US jobs drop third in a row"

"Education gap worries Sutherland"

"IMF warns of Irish housing slump"


It's a wonder, Desperate's nickname isn't Comical, ain't that right, David???

posted by Christophe at 4.4.08 3 comments

Thursday, April 3, 2008

PARTY PARTY PARTY!!!

I can't really give a properly expressed, sober reaction to this news... Save that I nearly ran for the Champagne, it's bizarre that an event like this has given me such a lift and it's not a result in the Champions League...

Patrick Bartholomew Ahern has announced, for those who didn't catch it!, that he is leaving the top job on May 6th... I'm going to reserve realistic comment until that point, one of my old lecturers used to keep a bottle of whiskey in the drawer for the respective kicking of buckets of Thatcher and Reagan... In sincere terms, this is a similar watershed for myself... It's not vindication, lord no, it's just something I'll need to reflect on to put in proper perspective over the next few weeks...

Half the country still loves him and always will, half the country will always hate him and with what seems like good reason... I promise you a cogent rational analysis in the weeks to come, if only in tribute to my under-utilised political analysis qualifications...
posted by Christophe at 3.4.08 0 comments

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Archive Foxy Bassplayer of the Month - April '08

I was really plumbing for the bassplayer from Stellastarr*, anyone got a photo???

So, right now, I'm going for my old mate, Hillary Woods from JJ72... Purely on the basis that Concerto for Constantine featured the ex lead singer from the JJs on lead vocals when they supported the Pumpkins earlier this year...

Hillary, where are you now??? And can I have your number???






posted by Christophe at 1.4.08 0 comments